My natural hair journey taught me self-acceptance
My first month of embracing my natural hair. Spring 2013
Like many black women around the country, my hair was chemically processed at young age. I remember the stench of the no-lye “Just for me” relaxer, ever so lightly burning my scalp away. Although I was in pain, it was worth the process to become the image of those cute little black girls in the commercial and on the box singing “Just for me!!!”. “God I want to be just like them” I would say secretly in my personal prayers. I wanted to dance like them, with a thick bang and two full and luscious ponytails on each side. However, my hair was pretty short, dry and thick. I remember asking my mother why my hair wouldn’t grow. My mother told me to pray on it. Once I got my hair relaxed I felt pretty, but still lacked the self love I assumed I would obtain through long strands. So of course the feeling was short lived.
Fast forward to the age of 30. I’ve definitely had my fair share of ups and downs with my natural hair journey. From the fright of the big chop, the moments I tried to hide the awkward stage of growth with wigs, braids and hats, all the way to the day that I decided to be proud of my “crown” and wear my natural hair gracefully was a process. Loving my hair was a challenge seeded with insecurity. I know some “naturalistas” will say that it isn’t a challenge, but to me it was. They say it takes 21 days to break a habit. Imagine how long it takes to undo society’s definition of beauty. To grow up thinking that “nappy is unhappy”, or “straight is great” takes some time to undo. How could I possibly be beautiful when everything that represents beauty in media isn’t me? Now add hair to the equation. I am already 5’10, plus size and dark skinned. Now I wanted to add natural hair to the equation? How would I be seen? How would my place of employment handle this “new look”? How will men react? Will they still find me attractive?
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Everyone’s personal journey with deciding to go natural is different and personal, but the end results should be clear. We should all be proud of whatever natural state we were born with, learn to embrace it and take care of it.
Let’s talk! Has your natural hair journey taught you any life lessons?
