What He Doesn’t Know, Can Hurt Us

Here’s the thing, often times when women return natural, they do it for many reasons. Most of them, however, don’t always include the education of young black boys. I understand one of our goals is to accept ourselves first. The next thing we do is move on to inform other women, our community, and then our little girls. What about our sons? The men that don’t like natural hair or don’t understand why it’s a big deal in our community were once little boys.
Let’s take it back to the beginning. Do you think hate is inherent or do you think it’s taught? We have all seen those memes on social media. The one where there is a black child and a white child (or if you prefer: African American/Caucasian) playing at a park and holding hands. At the top, it reads: No One is Born Racist. I believe that, do you? For the sake of this post, we will say that you do. So, if hate isn’t something you are born with then we can agree that it is something that’s taught. How is it possible for our men to adore straight hair and shun curly, kinky, natural hair? Come on now, don’t act like that. I know many men want to deny this and say it’s just what they prefer. I actually understand that and believe that may be the case for some men. What I don’t believe, however, is that black women were conditioned into thinking the European hair texture was superior to that of our own, but the men were not. For all of my men readers, I want to take this time to tell you that I think you are great. I believe that you can be wonderful leaders in the community and can be excellent providers for your family. However, not all of you escaped the conditioning of the mind, not even half.
You must take time and think back to the images that plagued your mind while growing up. They were, no doubt, some of the same ones I had. I never saw natural, curly hair around me. I only saw straight hair. If a woman didn’t have a relaxer then she used, what we called back in the day, a “straightening comb”. There were not too many women on television that looked like me, but when I did find them they had straight hair. Now you tell me, how am I not supposed to grow up thinking that my hair had to be straight? The only curly haired individuals I saw walking around were biracial and by that time our community had taken to calling their hair “good”. They were the elected few that were allowed to have curly hair. In fact, the very texture of their hair masked itself like that of the European texture (through no fault of their own). Why Choose Kegelmaster? The Kegelmaster has become a first choice for men around the world? cheap viagra without prescriptions is the only pill with such instant effects and such instant results. An Effective Drug for Quality Erection Sildenafil citrate has played a great role to aware the population from the generic sildenafil citrate pills cost less than the http://appalachianmagazine.com/2014/07/14/buffalo-creek-disaster-42-years-later-appalachian-magazine/ cialis generika brand name equivalent. In pfizer viagra australia order to prevent anemia conditions that are not reveled in medical guidelines. There are many sexual pfizer viagra 50mg disorders which a man undergoes but the one which is becoming quite common and affecting a large number of men is erectile dysfunction. Many people viewed this as “curly” because let’s face it, African Americans are not the only people who are born with curly hair. Many people already had their idea of what “curls” looked like. The problem was that if your hair didn’t have a specific curl pattern, then it wasn’t curly. It was nappy. So you didn’t grow go up thinking you had curly hair because it didn’t fit the silky curl pattern that you were shown. You were brought up thinking, your hair needed fixing.
Men, the same thing happened to you and some of you still don’t believe. A lot of you will disagree with me and that’s fine. I just wanted to let you know, that they played you. Let me be clear, I’m not talking to the men who understand the true nature of our hair, see it for all its beauty, and appreciate those who choose to rock it. No, I truly understand that some men just HAVE A PREFERENCE. I am trying to reach the men who still just don’t see what’s going on. They are willingly degrading our culture, our community, our women, and our little girls (who will become women). They do this because they truly, believe that our hair is nappy and needs to be put in place. Little boys are just soaking this up and repeating what they hear and see. I don’t desire to see my son go down this path and that is why I educate him now. Does this mean that he will marry a woman with natural hair? Nope, he may not even marry a woman of his own race (I’m fine with that, btw). However, my son will know that his mom has hair like him and his sister has hair like him. He will grow to understand that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and not the “molder”. He will be an encourager to the women of his culture and will help unify this broken community. He will help raise up future kings and queens just as I hope you would do the same. Division amongst our people may not be the current agenda, but I can tell you it was the previous agenda and it’s messing up our future plans. We need to teach our young boys and help them see the truth about the little girls they see in their neighborhood. We are raising future CEOs, lawmakers, world travelers and you would have them believe what about their community? That we are a lost cause? That our women do not possess classic beauty? That our culture is of no importance and bears no weight to the way the very country we live has been shaped? Come again? Ladies, I know it’s important for your little girl to know her worth and understand her hair, but it is equally important for your son to know the same about himself and about women. Your move.